White board!

finally got something for short messages (:
felt so noob cause it took me a while just to cut and paste the html in the right place. getting real rusty there jase. hahaha!

last class tmr, and glad that internet can still function well, but boy its hard to get hold of the very unstable connection around here...

should be updating a bit more these days, but then again, i can be quite boring rite? hehe you never know :P

on my mind...

are the things God showed me
the things God will show me
and recalling,
the things God has already given me.

the Gold is being refined,
the Iron is being sharpened,
the Mind is being renewed,
the Body is being strengthened,
and my Heart longs to know you..


i shall find out for sure some day :)

Silent Amazement

i had finally settled into subang, after 2 weeks of intense schedules, overwhelming work and an exciting trip down south. each account is a story by itself, new discoveries that each quietly add to and inspire me to hold on, stand still and charge forward :)

just finished my last mid sem exam on econs. one that i actually properly for. i'll be doing well for that one hopefully :p

despite the hectic times, something awesome i realised.. that those timings/sequence of things going well and fitting into my 24, is like a silent, passive, but equally amazing blessing. its not just once, twice, or three times these past weeks that i've went to sleep or planned something, but find myself resting overtime (overslept)/apportioned time but 'overslept' to the exact right time, just enough rest, to continue the day's task. or apportioned something just to find that it went well. for a person particular about timing, its something that i'm attuned to, and thankful for ;)

eg1. i went to sleep when a presentation and assignment were due. scheduling myself to wake up 2 hours later, i had slept 5 hours instead, right up to enough time for me to drive to ss15, and shift to presentation mode. i have done enough presentations to know that if i slept less, i'd look MORE stoned, and worse, incoherent. the assignment i found out, could be delayed for small penalties (which, i gladly took)

eg.2 just yest i realised that i had scheduled myself to go to church (i had forgotten my classes end at 3.30, not at 1) but plan was cancelled cause no one would be in the office. studying up till 1, i knew i had to wake up by 8, but woke up by 9.30. just in time for the last tutorial class of the semester.

mind you, i set alarms for all these occasions and more.. but, these were the ways i had enough rest. and rest i needed from a long weekend :)

not to promote procrastination at all! but inspite of my shortcomings, i can see Grace working in this manner without what i described to andrew as 'fireworks' of the faith. oh and that- had a good talk with my housemate after my own discoveries at the johor retreat. quite a time!

i have my questions, and can only see limitations sometimes.
but my God is mighty to save (Zephaniah 3:17)
and that's a silent amazement i'll carry in the back of my mind and maybe in the cheer of my smile :)

Praise His name!

Regen

when the busy days fade away.. i can think more of the future. at times it fills me with fear. thoughts of impossibility. BUT that is when i sense Hope. something amazing waiting. its not always easy, my eyes, they still see only me, alone... i'm still learning, to trust more in His faithfulness to me. He's always there. its just that at times, we're never here.


".....so when you don't know what to do, do what you know to do."

its not the time to give up yet, jase :)



there was one day last crazy week that i had given up, abandoned my confidence in finishing my workload. i prayed for rest, left it to God, and slept. i woke up at the right time to reach college, and enough rest to be presentable at my presentation. i woke up with a dream i can't remember. but i know that my mind was different than when i went to rest. i literally whined my way through work and escaped at every possible point. but when i got up that day... a singular thought crossed my mind:

time to man up and face up to your mistakes.

and that's where i knew i was renewed to carry on ;)

lesson

the very thing that i wrestle against may be the very thing that God wants to use to bless me. -when heaven is silent

its gonna be an interesting one to finish..

thursdays are LONG

when i think of the special time i have with God, i think its when i write.
its when i'm most critically open and genuinely frank.
its the highs and lows that i prefer to write about, cause what's there to an average day?
but even average days are becoming events :p

time to head back for that meeting..
i feel booked all the way till december.
i don't even want to check my calender to verify that LOLs!